Allowing Hannah Neate to smile again

Hannah Neate is a wonderfully enigmatic young ray of sunshine from Westbury, the metropolis of West Wiltshire. Everyone feels that the world is a better place once they have met her. HOWEVER, in recent times she has been snared by the harsh, oppressive regime of the evil Mr Crogworthy (name changed for legal reasons) and is having to get by on a month for the sort of money that charming rogues throw away on a restrained night on the town. With your help, through the signature of this petition, Hannah will be able to smile again and will be able to purchase the 'Man Bag' that she has been longing to get hold of as a gift for a friend who has insufficient space in his pockets for everything he needs to get by as a modern man but is afraid of the bullying and abuse that may be hurled at his sensitive little self should he carry a handbag. Hannah, despite her own more than substantial problems, has been unable to sleep for worrying about the torment that the superficiality of twenty-first century living is causing to her friend. If you still remain unconvinced about whether you should sign this petition then just go to www.myspace.com/turbulenceadams, go to 'view pics' and search page 4 or 5 then lose yourself in the symmetry of that westcountry grin. Meanwhile, once Hannah gets her pay rise there will be no reason to keep on the miserable soviet-era communism throwback Derek and so someone far more deserving can serve groceries to the good folk of Westbury with a beautiful smile rather than a heart of stone. Thankyou so much for taking the time to read this and for signing the petition. It's all about making a difference to the lives of those who really deserve it.