The Flick Filosopher is a Hack

The undersigned humbly request that you stop the practice of film criticism on the basis of your complete ineptitude in said craft, as well as your lack of knowledge or scope about the history or art of film. Every review of yours is nothing more than a soapbox upon which to rant about your political, social and religious opinions, with the film that you're supposed to be discussing acting as a mere pretense for your obsessive diatribes. When you are not engaged in an inconsequential tirade, you're patting yourself on the back for enjoying nerd culture or being a part of Generation X...neither of which ever have anything to do with the film you're talking about, or really, anything at all. You rarely if ever speak of any sort of film theory, and your complete omission of the tecnical qualities of nearly every film you've ever reviewed is startling. You constantly assail the romantic comedy genre, and yet when you do write a screenplay (Bronx Cheer), it's nothing more than the same fluff which you so despise, except that it's tailored to your particular fantasies, which apparently must make it unique in your mind. We are shocked that you've managed to cultivate what is admittedly a healthy readership despite your absence of actual cinematic knowledge, and would at the very least like to make it known that we prefer film critics who legitimately discuss film, rather than use it as an excuse to talk about themselves. We will not take seriously the opinion of any film critic without actual credentials and knowledge of the art of film, and will certainly not listen to a supposed critic with ideas as inconsequential as yours.