A Call to Restore the Proper Use of the Apostrophe

We the concerned readers and writers of the English-speaking world recognize the paramount importance of written communication in public and private discourse. We further recognize that proper spelling, punctuation, and grammar form the basis of effective written communication. We therefore stand united in disgust at and opposition to the incessant, brazen misuse of the apostrophe to perform grammatical functions other than forming contractions or indicating possession. We believe that a society's decline first manifests itself in the subtle details of that society's common life, and that the widespread use of apostrophes in plural nouns heralds the inevitable demise of our society.

Therefore, we call upon all people who write in English to only use the apostrophe in grammatically appropriate situations. We further call upon all people who read in English to boycott the works of authors who persist in abusing the apostrophe.

Remember:
If you have children, then you have kids.
If your child has a pet fish, then that fish is your kid's.
If your children collectively share a trust fund, then that fund is your kids'.

Writers of the world, unite!