Petition for an Official Brian Scalbrine Celtics Dancer

Being a Celtics fan I take a lot of pride in every member of my team, and I would hope that the Celtics organization feels the same way. Unfortuntately, this does not appear to be the case. I have been to three home games this season and have noticed that the "Celtics Dancers" only represent the "popular" or "good" players on the team by sporting a Garnett, Pierce or Allen jersey as they do their sexy and arousing routines for the Boston fans. My friends, there is a great injustice being held at the TD Banknorth Garden when a perfectly good red-haired Celtic Dancer does not proudly wear a Brian Scalabrine jersey on the parquet floor. It is time to make our voices heard and insure that appropriate representation is made for our 'little-engine-that-could' in the ranks of the Celtic Dancers. Help make the dream of a Brian Scalabrine Celtic Dancer a reality by signing my petition.