An open letter to God
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Dear God;
It has come to my attention that the world is a pretty unpleasant place. Supposedly you're the ultimate omnipotent benevolent entity, but I haven't seen much of this lately! Where is my Ferrari and harem of prostitutes? Eh? EH? I'm a nice kind of fellow so surely I deserve all this. But no, instead, it's the bad mofo's of this world who get the cash, chicks, and good looks! Just look at Bill gates! OK, bad example, but you get what I mean.
Furthermore, Mr. God. I haven't seen much evidence of your actual existence either. Sure, you did a few miracles and sent your son down, but that was 2000 years ago, and frankly any book that's 2000 years old is a little suspect if you ask me. (C'mon, the VIRGIN Mary? Who are you trying to kid, eh, God you stud!).
Basically, we the undersigned want immediate evidence of your existence, plus rewards for us being good boys and girls all our lives. Do this (a trifling feat considering you made the world in 7 days), and I'll be happy to go to church and stuff like that. Come on God, don't dissapoint us!
It has come to my attention that the world is a pretty unpleasant place. Supposedly you're the ultimate omnipotent benevolent entity, but I haven't seen much of this lately! Where is my Ferrari and harem of prostitutes? Eh? EH? I'm a nice kind of fellow so surely I deserve all this. But no, instead, it's the bad mofo's of this world who get the cash, chicks, and good looks! Just look at Bill gates! OK, bad example, but you get what I mean.
Furthermore, Mr. God. I haven't seen much evidence of your actual existence either. Sure, you did a few miracles and sent your son down, but that was 2000 years ago, and frankly any book that's 2000 years old is a little suspect if you ask me. (C'mon, the VIRGIN Mary? Who are you trying to kid, eh, God you stud!).
Basically, we the undersigned want immediate evidence of your existence, plus rewards for us being good boys and girls all our lives. Do this (a trifling feat considering you made the world in 7 days), and I'll be happy to go to church and stuff like that. Come on God, don't dissapoint us!
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Goal
500 signatures
Goal: 100
Latest Signatures
6 January 2016
2 January 2016
499.
Misty Pittman
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First, how can you believe in Satanism and not God???The Devil creates evil on earth. There is a God, but you are free to make your own choices. I choose Heaven not Hell, Hell is a real place. You need to wake up and accept God so he can turn your life ar
24 December 2015
19 December 2015
497.
Exin Roach
|
I'm HornyPorny and god ate my Sammich!
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
A Nightsaber as a horse!
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
If great boobs smash the world.
Will you be immediately converting to Satan
8 December 2015
496.
Matt N
|
Damn right!
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
Sex, and lots of the stuff
Will you be immediately converting to Satanism if God fails to perform the above?
No
24 November 2015
495.
Barnaby Crawford
|
I doubt that any god would read online petitions but I may be mistaken...
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
A new computer.
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
A new computer.
Will you be immediately convertin
10 November 2015
494.
Xiao L
|
WHY????????????
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
to know
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
to know
Will you be immediately converting to Satanism if God fails to perform the above?
No
17 September 2015
14 September 2015
492.
Jesus C
|
Hey, thanks for the applause!
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
Some itch cream for these dang nail holes in my hands
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
A significant raise in my allowance
Will you be immedia
28 August 2015
23 August 2015
16 August 2015
489.
Anthony S
|
1 0//n j00!!!11
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
1337 |)0|Zn 574r
Will you be immediately converting to Satanism if God fails to perform the above?
No
9 August 2015
488.
Matty Huber
|
В
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
Legalize Absinthe in the USA
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
He would have to get me an apartment on the moon
Will you be immediately converting to Satanism if God fails
6 August 2015
487.
Mr Godd
|
My what a tirade...the text you placed in the Name column is "so inappropriate." I at least sign my name when I write. I am God and my last name is Damnit.
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
Good deads make you selfish. Right. And I sup
24 June 2015
6 June 2015
485.
This Isnotf
|
This Is Not Funny
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
This Is Not Funny
What will you take as sufficient evidence of God's existence?
This Is Not Funny
Will you be immediately converting to Satanism if God fails to perform the above?
No
2 June 2015
28 May 2015
26 May 2015
482.
Chris Silva
|
I've been pretty good! I mean, sinned a bit, but who hasn't? Yea, I'd just like a little proof and reward... Perhaps a raise in allowance? I know you're there... I just want a sign.
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
money, clothes, and
19 May 2015
15 May 2015
8 May 2015
19 April 2015
18 April 2015
477.
Cleansed Bythebloodofj
|
God please have mercy on your decieved children here on Earth. If they only really knew the truth of the finished work of the cross and what Jesus has done for them.
What reward do YOU want from God for your good deeds?
Eternity in Heaven
What will you t
13 April 2015
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