Billy Mays Appreciation Day

To the proper Government Officials:

We, The Undersigned, would like to propose a new Official Government Holiday. We Propose to you "Billy Mays Appreciation Day." This holiday would be used to honor the greatest pitchman in American History. Billy Mays was the heart of America and this country would not have great inventions like Oxi-Clean, KA-BOOM!, or the Awesome Auger without him. These and other wonderful products like The Big City Slider Station, Hercules Hooks, and Mighty Putty are a common staple of American History. Without Billy Mays, these staples of American culture and others like Orange Glo, The Quick Chop, and Zorbeez would not be in millions of homes today. What would you do if you had stained laundry without Billy Mays? You sure wouldn't be getting that stain out with the power of oxygen with the help of Oxi-Clean now would you? It's moments like these that make America shine. Billy Mays stood for everything that was American. We have Columbus Day and Presidents Day, why not have some sort of Billy Mays Day? Billy Mays helped others who's only chance to live the American Dream was to have him scream about their inventions on TV. Billy Mays entertained us all, my friend, and we would be nowhere without him. His products grace our kitchens and our bathrooms and even spread all the way out to our utility sheds. We have created this petition to get Billy Mays the recognation he deserves. If you didn't love Billy Mays, you didn't love America. You don't hate America, do you? Of course not, thats why Billy Mays Appreciation Day is not just requested, it's demanded, and the most logical direction for the greatest country in the world. And that country is America. Please make our dream a reality. Thank you.