Mars for Americans

Dear President Bush, The undersigned are dismayed to learn that the Europeans are building a Mars space probe. This action can only be construed as a sign of European interest in, and ultimate colonization of, Mars. Like you, we consider Mars to be an American planet. To date, you have not condemned the European action, which is an obvious slap in the face to American hegemony and blatant unlawful interference with our manifest destiny. Please do something about this immediately. Kind regards, and keep up your noble patriotic work in Afghanistan. You have been an inspiration to us all.