Ressurect Steve Irwin

As you might have already guessed, this is the official petition in support of using ancient magics to ressurect our beloved Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin.

Our goal is simple. If we get enough signatures, and the demand is high, there is no way any government can refuse us; they will have to bring Steve Irwin back to life.

I will now take the time to outline a few plausible methods.

1. Freezing of the brain. Like Walt Disney, we can wait until our medical technology is advanced enough to bring him back to the world of the living. While we might not get to see his eventual return (like those that have long been waiting for our savior, Jesus Christ), future generations will come to understand the love, enthusiasm and crikeyness he put into his work.

2. Demonic possesion. I believe that it is possible to raise an evil spirit from the world of the damned, put it in Irwin's body and simultaneously perform an excorcism on him. The flux of powers, light and dark, should block the Crocodile Hunter's soul from reaching Heaven and pull it back to his body.

3. Pet Cemetary.

4. Phoenix Down.

As a level 31 Warlock, (LFG, Thorium Brotherhood), I would be more than happy to use a soul stone on Irwin if the any of the above methods prove successful to insure that this doesn't happen again.

If you're reading this, Steve, I hope you know we're trying our best. With luck, we'll be seeing you soon--just remember, rogues can't MT, all they do is stealth and stand in the corner. I wish you had known sooner.