Sonic The Hedgehog 4!
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WHEREAS, pretty much the entire Internet agrees it's going to suck;
WHEREAS, said Internet goes on to say, "Man, the old Sonic games rocked...why don't they just make a fully 2D Sonic platformer again?";
WHEREAS, Sonic Unleashed doesn't count as "fully 2D";
WHEREAS, Sonic Unleashed also has that freaking Werehog;
WHEREAS, most media and hands-on previews of Capcom's upcoming downloadable title "Mega Man 9" have shown that it will, in fact, kick ass;
WHEREAS, Mega Man 9 is particularly being lauded for returning to the series' NES roots with its retro-styled graphics, sound, and gameplay;
WHEREAS, Mega Man sort of sucked for a few years but all signs show that MM9 is going to revive the franchise both critically and commercially;
WHEREAS, the programmers currently working on Sonic and the Black Knight could be writing code for Jet Set Radio Wii and/or Shenmue 3 instead;
WHEREAS, a 2D Sonic would be quicker, easier, and cheaper to program anyway;
WHEREAS, the "Sayyyy-GA" jingle that played when you booted up the Genesis-era Sonic games was, and still is, the epitome of awesomeness;
The undersigned supporters of this petition hereby request that Sega Corporation resolve to:
-Create a Genesis-styled 2D Sonic game entitled, simply, "Sonic the Hedgehog 4," referred to from this point onward as "The Game."
-Have the following three characters playable in the Game: Sonic, Tails, and Knuckles.
-Abstain from adding the following elements in the Game: guns, swords, gunswords, cats with an affinity towards fishing, aliens, any and all world domination plots more elaborate than "Dr. Robotnik is going to take over the world and Sonic has to stop him," emo hedgehogs, minigames, missions, mini-missions, 3D elements, Marine the Raccoon (unless her appearance is only to set up her untimely death at the hands of a cooler character), horse armor, obnoxiously Navi-esque genies, Crush 40, Omochao, 4D elements, Rouge the Bat, and glitchy camera controls.
-Give the Game the appearance and sound design of a Genesis-era Sonic game whenever possible.
-Remember that the main villain's name is "Dr. Robotnik," not "Eggman."
-Release the Game via the digital distribution channels of WiiWare, Playstation Network, and Xbox Live Arcade for a reasonable price.
-Include the "Sayyyy-GA" jingle upon booting up the game. We miss that.
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