Proletariat Off The Merritt!

While growing up in a guarded suburb of New Haven I have been increasingly bothered over the years due to the increasing presence of the proletariat and their pseudo-vehicles on the Merritt Parkway. This parkway is an upper-middle class staple; it exists solely for the aristocracy to commute swiftly to and from Manhattan. The highway itself has two lanes; one may construe this as to mean that it does not have enough room for your shitty ass Buick. Do not use the Merritt to commute to your dead end job or to buy replacement parts for your prided Black & Decker handsaw.

Nothing irritates me more than coming down the Merritt in the early evening and seeing traffic sprawled in front of me. As a proactive member of society, I would like to help the proletariat to find their rightful home: on the congested and dangerous I-95. The Merritt Parkway exists for the rich; there are rarely cops about so we can speed as we wish. Poor people cause accidents! Do your research people. Please support this cause even if you are a member of the working class and you stumbled onto this page while using your grandmothers computer. It is important to know your place. Now get out there and go play stickball until your ma calls! And if you are a member of the aristocracy please sign and do your part to honk at people who do not belong on the Merritt.