Fire Bill Simmons i.e. ESPN's "Sports Guy"

We are thoroughly disgusted with the way ESPN is wasting our money by taking up space with his column in ESPN magazine. Furthermore, we disapprove of any employment duties he currently does for ESPN. We cite a specific lack of originality, gross redundancy, and a general waste of ESPN's money.

Main reasoning behind petition:
I am sick and tired of wasting my money (I subscripe to ESPN the magazine) on Bill Simmons. Apparently to Bill, there is no other team in the U.S.A. than the Red Sox. And when another New England team wins a championship, they suddenly pop into Bill's superbly creative mind. Bill obviously does not know the meaning of sports. Sports are meant to bring people together in joyous times. Yet Bill continually pokes fun at loyal fans who want nothing other than to enjoy sports as a brotherhood and take from it the joys and disappointments that entail.

Case in point:

"Even in defeat, the Philly fans remained the enduring story of the week. They started descending on the city of Jacksonville in the middle of the week, tens of thousands of them, few of them with tickets, all of them with green Philly jerseys and goofy mustaches. They kept multiplying and multiplying ... by Saturday, every other person in Jacksonville had a mustache. They weren't just enjoying themselves; they were living a dream. At the Maxim party on Saturday night, there were random Philly fans stumbling around in full Eagles gear, like they couldn't imagine heading out in public in anything else. Driving for coffee on Sunday, I passed at least 10 Eagles fans holding cardboard signs and begging for tickets, offering as much as five grand for a pair."
-Bill Simmons
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/superblog/8


In the previous quotation by Mr. Simmons, he pokes fun at loyal fans. Does Bill find it amusing that maybe some people actually LIKE to enjoy sports, and feel very passionately about them? Apparently to Bill, New England trumps everything in every single way. This single-mindedness influences Bill to be a very poor journalist, lacking the objective integrity the job entails. That is why we request he be dismissed of his duties as an employee of ESPN.