Wesley T. Winter, Finish Your Damn Thesis!
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We, the undersigned, ask that you begin writing your thesis immediately. We are disturbed by watching the daily train wreck that is you playing online chess. As a show of good faith, we will each offer you one (1) bottle of fine liquor and one (1) moderately priced dinner of your choosing in exchange for the completion of your thesis by December 20, 2005.
In addition we ask that you grant clemency to Stanley "Tookie" Williams, and that you end your occupation of Iraq.
In addition we ask that you grant clemency to Stanley "Tookie" Williams, and that you end your occupation of Iraq.
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