Gophers Should Be Forced to Wear Hats at All Times

"cool Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? I dunno what you're talking about"

"Ja gut, ja? Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? Because of beavers."

"cool! Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? reasons!!"

"THINK OF THE GOPHERS!!! Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? Gophers have been one of the most discriminated against rodents of all time... they've been trapped, eaten, and ruthlessly murdered... seperated from their families and posioned with the m"

"YO YO YO Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? Because it makes me horny when they do."

"How this fits in the religion category, I'm not sure. But I fully endorse this. I've often wondered why gophers aren't forced to wear hats. I simply assumed that humans were too lazy to force headgear upon the gopher population. Why Should They Wear Hats,"

"Gophers and their Goddamn Hats! Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? I think it's necessary to make them look cooler and to keep their heads more dry. (If it rains)"

"Gophers should wear jimmy hats at all times. Horny little bastards. Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? OVERPOPULATION!!!!!!!!!"

"Oh, my giblets. Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? Because my giblets would be greasier than before, and things would seem oh so tasty and tangy. Even yo daddy would call it tangy. Yowza."

"Nani? Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? What kind of petition is this? This is just plain... weird x.X"

"those damn gophers.... Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? i dont understand this part"

"Non-hat-wearing gophers are an afront to my God. Without their heads covered, they absorb the lord's power with no thought of whence it came. All of them should be summarily executed. Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? The Lawd wills it!"

"Fuckin' Gophers..... Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? Becuase tha' only good gopher is a dead gopher....or one wearing a hat that covers their ratty little heads...I don't mean baseball caps either...I mean tha big fuckers, that leave nothing to"

"word Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? because I said so eh"

"right on! Why Should They Wear Hats, Do You Believe? because my shlong is huge"